Prayers Answered!!!!

Every night when I go to sleep I say the same prayer. Dear God, please help us find our baby & help our birthmother find us. We want nothing more than to be parents, please help us. Amen.

Today that prayer came true. I typically check my Facebook several times a day (addicted, I know!) so today just like normal I logged in and saw I had a private message. Upon opening it I saw it was from the lady who took my sister's wedding photos. The message said "I saw a while back you had something on your page about wanting to adopt. Can you call me" So I did and she proceeded to tell me about a girl she knew that was approximately 5 months pregnant and because of (long story) she was planning on putting the baby up for adoption. She went on to explain about how Jerry and I were the first people she thought of. *Mind you I've not seen or talked to her since my sisters wedding almost 1 year ago.* She said the girl was anxious to meet us if we were interested and went on to talk about going to appointments and ultrasounds and such. When we hung up the phone I was literally shaking. I couldn't believe what had just happened. I ran outside to call Jerry but he didn't answer (go figure!) so instead called my sister. I was crying so hard she could barely understand me and thought I'd been in an accident or something. I finally got it all out and she was just thrilled for me and told me to go and do some toe touches! lol

I finally got done talking to my sister and went back inside at work, which was right around the time Jerry called back. So I went out and told him and he just kept saying ok, ok, ok. I finally yelled IS THAT ALL YOU CAN SAY IS OK?!?! He said that he was just in shock and even though we pray every night that he never actually thought something like this would happen.

I finally got settled back in a work and my cell phone rings with the photographer again. I immediately thought "Oh no, she changed her mind already!" but she was calling to tell me that she talked to the girl and she wants to meet us THIS Wednesday at 6 pm!!!!!

I'm feeling so many emotions right now. I'm happy, grateful, excited but also nervous, worried and slightly terrified. I want to be excited and have faith that everything will work out like it's supposed to but it's very hard and we've already been through so much that I don't want to get my hopes up and be crushed in the end.

We meet her on Wednesday and I'll update again then. Please pray for us and for her and that everything will work out and we'll be adding a baby to our family in a couple months.

Crystal Ball

I wish that I could see into the future for just a little while to see where I'm supposed to end up. I know that life would be no fun if everyone got everything they wanted and knew exactly how things would play out but just a glimpse would be nice.

I want to ask where I should be looking to find the children that God wants in my family. I wish I knew how to get ourselves out of our money situations. I wish I knew a lot of things really.

I'm just stressed and confused I guess. I want nothing more than to be a mother but I just don't know how to make that happen. It doesn't help that I've been helping my little sister get things set up and ready for her 2nd baby to be born in a couple months. It's just hard, I'm 5 years older than her and she's having her 2nd baby and I still have none. It's incredibly difficult not to be jealous.

Hopefully soon I'll be able to find my way on the right path. Right now I guess I'm stuck wishing for a Crystal Ball to show me the way.